my last nerve – a shitty poem

“the ao3 is a safe space for writers” 

okay but

i am a writer 

with an account on ao3

and i’m telling you

that it’s not a safe space for everyone

considering how much racism towards characters and fans of color

are present

unchecked 

and untagged

on that website

and how many people are bending over backwards to defend the status quo

and have ‘splained the ao3′s inner workings

and/or

suggested that fans of color simply hide offensive content

as if racism isn’t subtle 

or accidental

or everywhere

even in fandom

and it’s rarely fucking tagged –

because how can you tag for something you don’t know you wrote?

i am on my last nerve

with you people

and your fears of a slippery slope

and deeming everything

as part of purity wank

or callout culture

on a post talking explicitly about fandom racism.

what

the 

fuck

dudes

?

if ao3 is a safe space for writers

don’t writers of color deserve to be

safe

too?

I don’t think folks get how little I want to have (largely white) people telling me that they totally get what I’m saying about racism and the Ao3 and fandom only to turn around and like…

Splain the platform to me and continue to argue that the best (only) solution is hiding content from “people who might be offended by it” because removing offensive (in this context, racist) infringes on some right to write that literally ignores the fact that maybe it’s not that people of color find racism ~offensive~

but that fandom is actively harmful and that Ao3 is full of content that is racist as fuck and none of y’all have any idea how to handle that beyond “don’t like, don’t read 2.0” or telling folks to make their own archive

Like I’ve been checking the notes that have cropped up on my one post since NK Jemisin reblogged it (bless her, she is amazing) and I’ve got a bunch of white folks kind of completely missing the point of what I’m saying

(that in my experience as a black person in fandom, telling people to make their own x – archive or otherwise – doesn’t end well because white people literally won’t let us have things that are our own even in fandom)

in order to deliver commentary that’s still pretty darn close to “you can hide the content you find offensive, but the ao3 isn’t going to do anything about it”

And remember folks, my post is about racism towards and alludes to racist fanworks about black people

Which folks are essentially defending as free speech right on their reblogs as they rush to splain how the archive works/why it works the way it does.

If that’s all these folks have got to offer as their two cents, let me get them some refunds because I don’t want or need it.

inner-muse:

stitchmediamix:

That “if you start censoring x in fandom, all of these other non/less problematic or awful things will also be censored” argument around the Ao3 conversations I’ve been seeing is like… totally terrible because:

Keep reading

My 2¢: I don’t think anything should ever be censored because of nsfw content or strange/“horrifying” kinks. Some people write to cope with trauma. We don’t know what an author might be going through— and frankly it’s none of our business. But even if they’re not dealing with abuse or the like, fiction is a healthy outlet for expressing desires that aren’t otherwise acceptable. There’s research that shows the availability of porn decreases the frequency of sexual assaults (I don’t have a citation offhand, unfortunately). Provided content is tagged appropriately, I am strongly against censoring anything just because someone finds it depraved.

On the other hand… racism, bigotry, antisemitism, etc. is a whole ‘nother can of worms. Past a certain point I don’t think hate speech should be protected. I don’t have a definitive answer for where that line should go. Personally, I think public speech like rallies should be more restricted than it is in the US, but as for writing on Ao3… I’m ambivalent. I don’t think it’s okay to, say, use the Archive as a free hosting platform for a horribly racist manifesto that includes a link to a neo-nazi recruitment website, or something. But if someone just wants to write bigoted fiction that perpetuates harmful stereotypes? I mean… that’s terrible, and I wish there was a way to make people like that experience the harm they’re causing firsthand. But I do actually think they have a right to post their vile, abhorrent stories. And I don’t think Ao3 should be in the business of policing their content for “acceptable” material, outside of banning works that directly advocate violence or otherwise constitute harassment.

I realize that as a cis white woman I’m speaking from a place of privilege. I don’t claim to speak for marginalized groups that I’m not a part of; there are probably perspectives here that I haven’t considered. Make of that what you will, I suppose.

I’m not even going to get into the fact that you’re essentially lecturing me and missing the point of the post I actually wrote but like… you sat there and wrote the following words to a Black person in fandom with no sign of awareness that you were in the wrong.

I don’t think it’s okay to, say, use the Archive as a free hosting platform for a horribly racist manifesto that includes a link to a neo-nazi recruitment website, or something.

But if someone just wants to write bigoted fiction that perpetuates harmful stereotypes? I mean… that’s terrible, and I wish there was a way to make people like that experience the harm they’re causing firsthand. But I do actually think they have a right to post their vile, abhorrent stories.”

That is seriously messed up that you sat there and wrote these words without thinking about the fact that people of color exist in fandom and that our right to exist in fandom without being subject to racism trumps other fans’ “right” to write and post racist ass fanworks. 

They may not be as big a deal as rallies and shit TO YOU because you’re a white woman and all, but it’s still actually and actively harmful to people of color in fandom and our right not to deal with racism in fandom trumps racists’ “rights” to write racist shit.

Geez and cheese, I know I should tackle everything else you’ve said in your response to me but like I can’t get over the fact that you (hopefully) read all of what I wrote and probably saw my Black ass face in my sidebar/icon and still decided to pull a Britta-from-Community on me with regard to racism in fandom.

You know what I think is super useless?

That thing fandom does where, just because some people in a marginalized group like/are turned on by/find empowerment in a potentially problematic thing in fandom or media, it becomes sacred and no one can critique it because it’s now this like powerful thing that trumps the feelings of other people in the marginalized group that don’t like the thing and might even find it harmful.


See these super parapharased examples put together from stuff I have literally seen people say on here or twitter:

Don’t criticize queer folks for liking queer-coded villains because that’s all the representation we get 

Which ignores that a) queer coded villains literally are a result of homophobia and instilling fear of a queer threat and b) queer people who voice any negative opinion of a queer coded villain or a villain fandom thinks is queer coded

Fandom is primarily a space for women ~exploring their sexuality/gender~ so if you critique anything about fandom (but especially how so much M/M is a) about white guys and b) written by white women), you’re a misogynist

I literally got variations of that back in 2015 when I first posted my big slash shipping post about the misogyny and racism I’ve seen from slash shippers and in the patterns of shipping and guess what… not only am I largely lady-aligned, but I was getting called a misogynist for calling out misogyny

I’m a survivor of x and I write x to cope/because it turns me on/helps me manage my trauma… so it’s harmful to survivors to criticize content with x in it because what if the author uses it to cope/manage their trauma

But… what about survivors of x who think it’s harmful, uncool, stressful, bad, etc that people are writing x in the way that they generally do write anything that they probably shouldn’t make all sexy??


I’m working on the What Fandom Racism Looks Like: Slavefic instead of what I should actually be working on and I’m trying to figure out how to talk about the relationship between (white women’s) desire and slavery and how the shield of empowerment should really just remain in your D&D campaign instead of in fandom and like…

I hate that I have to try and figure out how to write this so that I won’t be subject to rude messages from people because I comment harshly on a thing they’re into and point out what “real slavery” looked like (and how it wasn’t sexy)

It still frustrates me how like… the only views from marginlalized people in fandom that genuinely matter in fandom are the ones that go along with the status quo of fandom – even when it’s like a super pseudo progressive fandom.

I saw a tweet from someone talking about how it made them uncomfortable to see the OP of a 9-tweet thread about how Hux was canonically queer coded get mocked because she was a queer woman of color and like… many of the people commenting on or about the thread were… queer people of color themselves.

Fandom doesn’t care about fans of color talking about racism in their fandoms unless they’re waving away responsibility. Like if you’re Black and you talk about how Rey/Kylo stans have, for like over two years, shat all over Finn for the sake of their ship and they’re not even very subtle about it, you’re just a jealous Finn/Rey shipper but like… if you’re Black and you’re like “um, I love villains and the Rey/Kylo fanbase isn’t racist at all”… you’re solid gold to the fandom.

Like I’m going to write this 5000+ word post (it’s at 3900 now so that’s likely) about slavery and Blackness and how even when you’re not writing about Black people, you’re informed by our historical subjugation, and get brushed off because some other Black person will be like “oh, so I’m racist against myself for liking stories about slavery” and the people who should be reading my post and going “hm… i never thought about that” will be like “oh, a token Black has spoken up against the sexual policing beastie so we can keep doing what we’re doing uncritically because we’ve got our seal of black approval”.

Fucking hell, y’all.

I hate that I have to gird my loins over this shit because the way fandom works is that the second a marginalized person speaks out against a thing another marginalized person is critiquing, the latter person’s opinion appears to be utterly negated because ~that person’s like you and they weren’t offended/hurt~ has a fandom translation and it’s RIDICULOUS.

I’m honestly so glad that I don’t have the money to take the niecelings to see Infinity War.

Two of them have been watching MCU movies for practically their whole lives and are so fond of the characters and from everything I’ve heard about this movie from all of y’all?

It’s not worth it to spend a crap ton of money just to break their hearts.

stitchmediamix:

I don’t think many people see how horrid the supposedly progressive and anti racist parts of tumblr/twitter fandom are to Black characters/fans/performers on the regular. They curate their spaces so well that the only time they see a hint of the antiblackness in fandom is when Black people aren’t nice about dealing with it and insult a white person.

So when they see Black people talk about how done they are with folks defending Ad@m Driver’s “ugly ass” from folks/posts on social media he’ll never see talking about his looks while the same fandom says that constantly talks shit about John Boyega in posts he’s tagged in  they rush to be like“wow, that’s bad feminism to fight racism with bullying and my activism calls for me to defend everyone and blah blah blah”

But like… The white guy is ALWAYS defended. He’s always coddled. That’s literally one of the biggest problems in the Star Wars fandom, that the trilogy villain and the guy who plays him gets more respect and empathy from the fandom than John Boyega and Finn do.

Keep reading

I don’t think many people see how horrid the supposedly progressive and anti racist parts of tumblr/twitter fandom are to Black characters/fans/performers on the regular. They curate their spaces so well that the only time they see a hint of the antiblackness in fandom is when Black people aren’t nice about dealing with it and insult a white person.

So when they see Black people talk about how done they are with folks defending Ad@m Driver’s “ugly ass” from folks/posts on social media he’ll never see talking about his looks while the same fandom says that constantly talks shit about John Boyega in posts he’s tagged in  they rush to be like“wow, that’s bad feminism to fight racism with bullying and my activism calls for me to defend everyone and blah blah blah”

But like… The white guy is ALWAYS defended. He’s always coddled. That’s literally one of the biggest problems in the Star Wars fandom, that the trilogy villain and the guy who plays him gets more respect and empathy from the fandom than John Boyega and Finn do.

No one can send Driver any messages about his looks or talent on social media. People constantly tell JB how useless they think he is, how they wish Kylo was the hero, how JB doesn’t have the chops to be a hero opposite Daisy R (despite him having a meatier acting roles than she did when cast in TFA). They do things like say he “doesn’t look like a leading man”, call him a cuck, mock him/Finn for being “friendzoned”… all in his mentions on twitter or instagram.

Like I know it’s hard for folks in fandom to see a white guy get insulted and not rush to correct that, but there’s a reason it’s happening.

The immediate response to write essays about intersectionality 

and how it’s wrong to “bully” Ad@m

in response to folks being annoyed with how white guys ALWAYS get defense squads from fandom are a huge part of that reason.

Folks in fandom – aside from black folks and some nonblack people that are aware of what’s going on – aren’t doing this for Finn or John Boyega. They’re not preaching about their feminism shaping their activism when folks post unsubtle digs at everything from his character, to his looks, to his talent.

It’s ONLY the white guy that fandom cares about defending and that’s not intersectional activism in the slightest. It’s just too convenient that no one ever sees the tons of antiblack racism we get to deal with in fandom but like… the second we snap or are vaguely unkind it’s like 

“oh no, you’re all bad feminists and bullies” 

Which is… mighty convenient…

Any way, if your supposedly intersectional activism or feminism leads you to barrel into defending a white actor being called ugly because ~everyone is totally equal~ and you don’t even bother to look at what Black people in the same fandom go through on the regular (on a post about how fandom ignores the treatment his Black coworker gets from fandom), it’s already bullshit.

#KeepIt